


Fifty Shades of WTF?

by Nekhbet



Category: Fifty Shades of Grey (2015), Fifty Shades of Grey - All Media Types
Genre: Gen, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-18
Updated: 2016-01-18
Packaged: 2018-05-14 20:15:11
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,086
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5756743
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nekhbet/pseuds/Nekhbet
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Between nights with Ana, Christian brings home a seemingly meek women but gets more than he bargained for. Dialogue, warning weak grammar. (sorry no time for perfect) Anti fic.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fifty Shades of WTF?

It is what it is...or Christian Grey gets the truth.

 

 

\--"Wow, oh my god? This is kind of disturbing."

"I enjoy a certain fetish, remember what I told you at dinner. About my childhood. Well, I think it may have damaged me. Just a bit."

\---"You hit women with these?"

"More than that."

\---"Oh my, I..."

"I've wanted to punish you the moment I laid eyes on you."

\---"Why me?"

"Because you look like a dirty whore. One with a cunt that needs a shove of a hard cock."

\---"W...what..what would you do to me?"

"Bend you over. Spank you until your ass is red. If your not wet by the time your ass blushing I'd have to take a cane to you also. Then turn you on all fours and show you a little surprise or two. I'd put a little something in your ass. Then fuck you hard. I'd slap your burning ass with every firm push of my cock. I'd fuck you raw. Then make you beg me to let you cum."

\---"I had no idea..I...I.."

"Now you know. So what do you think?"

\---"I think your collection's okay...but you seem pretty tame."

"What?"

\---"Yeah."

"You've done things like this before?"

\---"Why do you think I let you hit on me?"

"Maybe your not for me, I like my women a little less experienced."

\---"You mean your titless mouse, Ana? That girls features match her demeanor Did you ever realize Christian that all in all, you make her cum in the end? My ex would literally ravage me before he granted me the pleasure. If he did that is. He'd often leave me to give my fingers a workout."

"You have no idea what I could do to you."

\---I have heard a great deal about you Christian and seeing the kind of girl that gets you hard, I have some idea. My friend told me about you Christian, and I don't fucking get it. You play this person who thinks he's such a man, but your not that person Christian. Not at all. I mean come on, Ana!? really? It's as if you picked a dead leaf off the ground and told it "I'm going to crumble you." You are a fucking joke Christian. A real man would tear off a branch of ripe leaves and make one his bitch. But you found a crinkled petal under your shoe one day and figured oh I can handle this. You picked Ana to be your submissive because she reeked of victim. She was no fucking challenge. You are a bottom feeder Christian and Ana sank to your level simply because she can't swim.

\---Oh yeah and whats next...a contract? Are you shitting me? You actually took the time to draw up a sex contract? As if a women is going to take you to court and tell the judge, ""Oh I consented to butt plugs and whips, but I never said he could put that fourth finger in my ass."" A contract!? What a fucking nerd, ""the submissive this, the submissive that."" Do you want to write an agenda for when we should cum as well?"

\---A submissive woman is one thing. And that's what my ex went for as well, but he'd cum in me uncontrollably when I put up a fight. You see Christian, my ex was a Roman legionnaire, and his army had just conquered my city. I was a noble woman, and he'd slit my husbands throat. Then he'd tie me up and rape the hell out of me with whatever he pleased. He'd use any means to gain his pleasure. And I'd fight him, and scratch him and slap him, but as a woman I could never win. And only when he broke me did I become his slave. My ex was indeed a legionnaire. But you Christian, well, you're a foot solider of no rank. One who seeks out titless, flat-assed fight less girls like your Ana, and that's what does it for you. You'd take rag wearing virgin wench over a pampered royal with pride. A noble to be torn apart by the man who torched her city. I'd much rather have a legionnaire rape me and struggle in a fight than simply give it up to a man like you.

"I'm fifty shades of fucked up."

You are fifty shades of what the fuck. That's what happens when you fuck a virgin. You get a clinger. You should have hit her harder in the cunt maybe she would have gotten the hint. A dominate knows what he wants and takes it, get the fuck over your "fucked up childhood" pussy.

\---Your Ana is a piece of shit in the divot of a sneaker. One not worth scraping out. And that's why you like her Christian. But guess what, shit already expects to be treated like shit. What a dominate you are Christian, playing the big cat to mouse.

\---So I guess I'm not for you after all.

\---But that's fine. I can't see myself with a man with such poor taste.

 

\------------------------

Dear Ana,  
Why are you hanging out in my lawn? Oh yeah, it's because a dog past and someone didn't pick up after it. Get the fuck over Christian and his money. Is it so hard to grab a pair of heels ( Ones you can handle ) and find someone who will fuck your ass and not cry about it after? Do me a favor, the next time you're on the toilet let your fucking "inner goddess" slip out your ass, then you can stop pinching your cheeks in hopes that Christian will pull them apart. 

Kiss kiss!

 

\------------------------

Dear friends, please rethink your 50 shades fandom. These books and (""film!??!?"") were a mind fuck of awful. Why couldn't Christian and Ana have been hot!!!!!! It had such potential. Christian thought he was so "fucked up" but his "complex" is not uncommon and pretty uncreative on the author's part. And Ana...Hahahahahah Ana lost her virginity at 21! How is that hot!!!??? No wonder she jumped right into whips and ass plugs, the dumb bitch was so deprived! Their first time together Christian should have fucked Ana with a water bottle. --If he put a Dasani up her and told her it was because her cunt was dry as fuck...Then we would have had some literature. 

 

It really is a shame Ana and Christian were written as losers.  

 

**Author's Note:**

> But I will admit the author of 50 shades is a genius. This bitch made her money because she got every mini driving mother in America to read her piece of shit book while they make dinner to Sponge Bob playing in the background.  
> 50 Shades is what it is. Mommy porn. And Ana is such a stupid fucking character. "Oh my inner Goddess." What a dumb shit.  
> Tame!!!


End file.
